 Addiction is a disease. It is a temptation
harnessing the dark energy of temptation and the addiction consumes the
addicted person's soul. It's extremely difficult to endure the pain,
stress, and problems of an addiction involving someone you love.
There
are many emotions a person may feel when dealing with an addiction
crisis; hopelessness, anger, frustration, fear, sadness, disappointment,
stress, and judgment.
As
a sober individual watching an addict, these emotions often flood our
own souls because usually a sober person's mind cannot easily understand
how someone they love so very much could transform and allow addiction
to take over his or her life (and soul). The addict's mind is
different. It doesn't see. And that fact alone is a difficult concept
to grasp.
How does he or she not see that his or her actions
are harnessing temptation's dark energy? How can he or she not see
their actions make loved one's feel that he or she no longer care? How
can he or she not see that everything negative going on in his or her
life is a direct (or indirect) consequence of the abuse of drugs or
alcohol? How can he or she not see the hurt loved ones are feeling and
that relationships are suffering or ending because of the addiction?
Again,
remember an addict's mind is consumed by temptation and temptation
tries very hard to make sure an addict cannot see things in the same
light of a sober person. The only focus on an addict's mind is how to
get his or her next fix or how to get enough money for his or her
addiction. An addict usually isolates himself or herself from
non-addicts to avoid having to face reality. Addiction doesn't just
affect an addict; it affects the family and friends of the addict too.
Even
though this may be difficult to see, an addict still possesses the soul
you love and miss. The goodness and light of the addict's soul still
exists, buried deep within him or her; though this may be extremely hard
for someone dealing with the stressful situation to recognize. Again,
ADDICTION is a disease and like any disease, it needs energy and work to
heal.
While it is true no one can cure an addict who doesn't
want to be cured, but that doesn't mean there isn't a way loved ones can
unite and offer support that will help an addict overcome his or her
addiction.
The website says over and over, we only evolve through our relationships.
Helping a loved one battle addiction is a very big opportunity for a
person's own evolution. The patience, love, selflessness, and sacrifice
that it takes to help an addict harness the strongest, most virtuous
energy that exists in this universe. The emotions described in the
first paragraph harness the most negative energy and are more in tune
with the Seven Deadly Sins.
 Of
course you may be thinking that it is impossible to remain loving,
patient and selfless in what seems to be a hopeless situation and
naturally want to blame the addict for all his or her wrongdoing.
Nothing
is impossible and sometimes the most challenging obstacles offer the
strongest opportunities for one top prove that impossible can become
"I'm Possible" when one's mind and actions transform.
What
outcome do you wish to see for your loved one plagued with the sickness
of addiction? Do you want his or her soul to be healed and return to
whom he or she once was? And if the answer is yes, then my next
question is what you are willing to sacrifice and work at about yourself
to give the outcome the best possibility of success. As with any
challenge, it is not about the energy and effort put in, it is about the
TYPE OF ENERGY AND EFFORT.
Love
is always stronger than hate but that doesn't mean you have to fill
yourself with love. You choose to LOVE no matter what. But you can also
choose to hate. Both choices lead to completely different paths of
destiny for your soul and the soul of your loved ones. Anger is the
strongest negative emotion and can destroy any chance of repairing the
damage caused by addiction. I am not underestimating the work and
effort it takes for a person to not hate, not be angry at or judge an
addict. An addict lies, steals, cheats, manipulates, and creates havoc
for families.
But
remember, the addict is sick. But love is again the strongest virtuous
energy and when one holds love in their heart and is driven by love, not
hate, amazing things can happen. Now, it is not just about "feeling"
love but demonstrating your love. It is about your actions, your
sacrifices, your tone of voice, and ultimately every decision made over a
period of time. Lashing out at an addict only increases his or her
desire to escape and usually has the opposite affect; leading the addict
straight to drugs or alcohol to escape. An addict's soul knows exactly
what he or she is doing and he or she will try to avoid facing reality
at any cost. The goal is to awaken the light in the addict's soul.
Healing
doesn't happen overnight, but it can happen. Chances grow stronger when
loved ones unite and decide to work together to organize a precise plan
of action. Strong and united efforts in loving support, demonstrated
by firm and organized action can make a difference over time. But a
plan is only as good as the execution which means anyone involved in the
battle against addiction MUST BE READY TO MAKE SACRIFICES and also be
consistent with his or her efforts. Again, please let me remind you
that patience, love, consistency, sacrifice, non-judgment, and support
(support doesn't mean enable!) are the energies one must work to possess
during the difficult time of fighting addiction. You
have to maintain a positive relationship so the addict will naturally
turn to you for help when they are ready to receive it.
Enabling
is not necessarily done on purpose, but in most situations doesn't help
an addict face his or her reality. If he or she is "getting by" in
life and still able to be an addict then there is typically no real need
to change - according to the mind of an addict. I suggest you refrain
from giving an addict ANY MONEY. This includes money for incidentals
like food, clothing and gas. Enabling also comes in the form of making
excuses for an addict's actions. My suggestion is if he or she misses
work or something else, do not cover for him or her. Accountability for
actions is another key fact that will help an addict escape denial and
realize his or her addiction is ruining his or her present and future.
Communication
is another key. If you are an individual working with others to heal an
addict, I suggest you work on OPEN COMMUNICATION. No matter how
stressful the situation may get, the TEAM SHOULD CONSIDER THE IMPORTANCE
OF WORKING TOGETHER AND AVOIDING CONFLICT WITH EACH OTHER.
Think
of a baseball team that has great talent and are off to a great start
to the season. If that team fails to communicate with each other, the
affect may be felt on the field. A great play that could've happen
never actually happens. Then, the breakdown of communication could
cause tension between team members, leading to arguments harnesses
temptation's energy. At the end of the season, the team misses the
playoffs. What path could the team (similar to your addiction battling
team) have created if they maintained communication and continued to
work together in a positive way? The answer - they could've been
champions.
Work with the Universe, not Temptation
 The universe
will create "events" for the addict and provide opportunity for them to
make a change. This could be an arrest, or an overdose as an example.
These events will increase if the addict remains on their current path.
We are all subject to universal events.
Eventually the addict
will reach a point where denial is no longer an option and a crossroad
presents itself. When the addict is ready to choose the path to the
light and wishes to overcome the grasp of his or her drug or alcohol
addiction, this is a crucial time when the words of this blog
could make all the difference between success and failure. An addict
will most likely need help. This is when SELFLESS LOVE is most
important.
What do you think the addict's chances of success
will be without the love and support of a sober, responsible loved one?
Remember, love is the opposite of hate. Anger is not an energy
representing love. No matter what the circumstance are, the minute you
let anger into your heart there is no room for love.
No matter
what situation, your soul always has the choice whether to love or to
hate. You have to remain "zen," and do not get drawn into an angered or
frustrated argument, as you will only be helping temptation do its
work.
At the end of your long, difficult road, you may be
surprised to see you've found you're loved once again. You may also be
surprised to see that your soul grew and is stronger than it was when
you started down this journey. Usually, difficult journeys lead to a
point where you look back and are able to smile and shake your head and
say, "YES, all the pain, heartache, work, and sacrifice were worth it."
The
love and light will not only exist in your eyes but in the eyes of your
loved one who at one point you might of thought was gone forever.
The
only limits in this world are the limits we set for ourselves. Change
your mind, change the energy you harness in your heart and soul, and
work toward the goal you wish to achieve and you may just see that you
not only achieve great change, but prove to yourself something that you
at one point thought was impossible. Remember, I'm Possible is a
different way a writing IMPOSSIBLE.
PS - If the situation is
severe, please consider an interventionist. How to execute a successful
intervention will be Part 2 of this blog topic.
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