Wednesday, January 29, 2014

How Do You KNow You've Found Your Soul Mate?

I just read your section on finding a soul mate. I was really intrigued by it, and can't tell you how much I love your website. I had a question for you based off of that section. The man I am with currently was someone that I felt this internal pull towards for a long time. 

Even though my mind would try to direct me otherwise, my inner just was so drawn to him, and eventually he became my boyfriend. I love him dearly, almost right away, which is hard for me as I usually take my time! However, I am not sure if he is my soul mate - he is a Sagittarius and we are clashing already. So my question to you is, how do you know when you have found your soul mate? I just felt at the beginning that this is my future husband, but doesn't everyone feel this way and yet not everyone ends up together? 

Sharon K.

Hello Sharon,

Thank you for your consideration (about asking whether you can ask your question on top of requesting a compatibility reading)!  You can write in anytime with any question.  My counseling is totally open for anyone and any question. 

Your question is a great one!  It is very wise of you to be thinking in the way that you are about your relationship.  Many people when they feel that internal pull (attraction for lack of better words), fall head over heels and go for it. In some cases, the attraction creates blinders to everything else and its not until much later that people question whether or not they chose the right person.

Not everyone is a soul mate candidate, though there are certain people who are predestined to enter your life and are what you can consider possible soul mates.  No matter what happens, these possible soul mates are meant to enter your life for some reason or another and there is usually an opportunity to learn and evolve from the relationship, whether it is the person you choose to spend the rest of your life with or not.  You see, timing is another aspect to the equation.  A soul mate candidate may come into your life; however one or both of you may not be ready.  By ready, I mean that perhaps one or the other person hasn't evolved into the person he or she could be, the person that would make the connection last through the rough times.  I say rough times because every relationship will have challenges.  Even the perfect ones! 

That is why there are a few pages on guiding people on how to find his or her soul mate.  You see, the spark is necessary but isn't the end all be all.  To find your true, lasting soul mate, first one has to spend some time deciding what the qualities your looking for in your soul mate are.  For example, a person may not respond well to anger and yelling (not everyone does), so on this list the person may write gentle and patient.  With time and with experience in relationships, people often learn what it is they are looking for in a person. 

The most overlooked step and perhaps the most important is the self evaluation where its suggested each person look at himself or herself and ask if my Prince Charming entered my life tomorrow, would he look at me and the person I am and feel the same way?  This doesn't mean that a person should go get plastic surgery and go on a crash diet.  Rather, with everything spiritual, it is within that matters most. 

Another example to explain is if someone writes on their "ideal soul mate list"  I want someone fit, well this ideal soul mate probably works out routinely in order to stay fit, right?  Would the ideal soul mate want a couch potato or someone to go to the gym or for a nice walk with, right?

To summarize (this is a topic I can write on and on about and sometimes get into too much detail!), I can't answer whether this man is your true soul mate (only you can), but can suggest you spend some time with the exercises suggested on the website's How to Find a Soul Mate (if you haven't already!!). 

Lastly, remember every relationship requires work, patience, understanding, and love.  If you harness these and take an honest self evaluation of what you want, who you are, what you can do to make the relationship even stronger, and whether or not this man is truly your ideal soul mate, you may find the answer was within you the entire time.

Feel free to ask any questions!

Love and Light,

Jordan Canon

Spiritual Advisor

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