I met someone a little over 2 years ago and my life has never been the same since. When we met, I was in a committed relationship (and still am) which somewhat pushed him to do the same. Yet, he chose to have an open-relationship with his mate because he is unable to stay fixed on a single partner. He's very touchy about being tied down, talks often about the need to be "free". He lost his mother to cancer at age 14 and lost his first fiance to a tragic car crash in his early 20's.
In many ways we are polar opposites (living in different countries, coming from very different religions, having a substantial age difference), yet the bond created between us was instantaneous and stronger than any I ever experienced before. We cause each other enormous amounts of pain because we communicate in different ways, we have gone to the depths of hell and back, and yet the connection stays strong and unconditional.
I am literally obsessed by this person day and night and it s driving me to distraction. On the one hand, I wish I had never met him because I have known so much agony since then, and on the other hand, I am deathly afraid of losing him. He claims to love me and yet certain behaviors of his lead me to believe otherwise. For example, he communicates more often with others than with me. I am in a constant state of doubt.
Can you give me any ideas on what this relationship is all about and how I can be less traumatized by it?
By the way, you already sent me a Synastry report, which I have and have read carefully, but I believe that my situation calls for additional guidance.
Thanks for writing in and sharing your feelings about the man in your life and a Happy and healthy 2014 to you.
Perhaps you may want to think about whether this man has the potential of being the person you can experience the soul mate relationship with, or if it is the "idea" of what could be that you can't let go of. What is it that you want more - the amazing experience of a soul mate relationship, even if with someone other than this gentleman, OR the current relationship you have with this gentleman, despite its many limitations, is it enough to make you satisfied and feel complete?
Love and Light,
Thanks for your reply Jordan. I really appreciate it. In fact, as far as I'm concerned, I'm already in a soul mate relationship with my primary partner.
I was thinking more along the lines of a "Twin Flame Connection" with this person who has emotionally turned my world upside down.
From reading that I've been doing, soul mate relationships are calm and comfortable, whereas twin flame connections can be devastating, turbulent, and very strong.
Part of me wants to believe that the very strong connection I have with this man is a twin flame connection (because it fits 90% of the criteria that are often given for this kind of relationship).
Yet, the other part of me wonders if the whole twin flame thing is just a crock of B.S. invented by people who were in incongruous relationships and needed reasons and explanations for their strong feelings.
You're very welcome.
There is a spiritual saying I share with others when he or she writes in unsure whether or not to invest energy into trying to figure out the meaning of something spiritual: If the spiritual message is unclear, then it is temptation trying to keep you from the light. When there is something that the universe wants you to know or understand, then there will be no room left for doubt.
Love and Light,